Choices

On the cusp of vacation, I remind myself to set clear boundaries regarding my time away. Work: true emergencies only, don’t forget you have a mandatory 2-hr teams call. Home: ehhh, Parts has it. Fun: enjoy every second!

The (partial) team!

Which leads me to a topic I know I’ve previously discussed on RoF. Two words: decision fatigue.

I don’t know the average number of decisions one makes a day, but I bet I outpace the average. By at least a hundred. As a leader, it’s expected and applauded to make decisions. I got it. Oftentimes, however, that role bleeds over into every other part of my life. And it’s tiring. I would still give the same percentage to my job even if I wasn’t being paid, but there is a level of expectation to relax while away from work, to simplify, to rest.

Perhaps I should approve a yes moratorium during vacation to combat the decision fatigue I will inevitably feel obligated to address. I’ll just say yes to everything. What do you want to eat? What time are we…? Do you want to stop here? How many minutes until…? When are we leaving? Where are we going? Have you…? Should we…?

Yes. The answer is yes. Does it truly answer a fraction of the questions? Meh. But the answer is yes! It never fails that at least a dozen instances will arise where I just remind everyone I, too, am on vacation and would really love to enjoy myself.

No more questions, please. Just yes.

____________________________

I ask you –

Is the most exhausting part of your day the decision-making?

(The post Choices first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Data Circles & Cycles

Screw this. -me, most of the time

You see that thing that says “Intensification Phase”? Well, the me who created this plan to coincide the Intensification Phase with my Luteal Phase (pre-period week, for any non-ovary owners) was an absolute idiot. My stomach looks like I drink beer for a living, and I’m craving donuts. Nonstop. I feel like garbage, I look like garbage, and my bloated belly is both uncomfortable and very unfortunate for my workout goals. I hate this part.

So, instead of complaining, kidding, I’m doing that anyway, I suck it up and complete the hellish workout, for intensification purposes only. Might even throw in a good run, to round off the rage and loathing. But, wait, there’s more! After the intensification phase is a lovely phase titled the Realization Phase, which is a nice way to say you’re about to lift some heavy a** sh*t and you’ll be powerful and awesome and toned and kick butt all day! Just don’t die.

And another thing! This is the worst time to learn a new skill, such as data analysis using this fun little program called Power Bi. It’s not fun. I should have been able to plug in an Excel document, tell it to analyze the data, and a happy graphic pop out. Ha. What I got was a headache, convoluted data, and no happy graphic. I did receive a graph, but it didn’t have anything populated so it was basically blank and unhappy. Much like me.

Fortunately, the very next day post-Power Bi BS was fraught with zero Internet connection so everyone received a reprieve from work. Haha sort of. Not me though. I had a 2-day unexpected delivery of fitness equipment I think everyone forgot about. They said delivery in April, then May. Almost July is good. There was trash scattered from one end of the facility to the other. I walked 18,000 steps that day and, if I’d known what the day would bring, I would not have run!

But guess who didn’t have to Power Bi that day? This girl! Alas, I still have tutorials to watch. And data to analyze. Pie chart, anyone?

Welcome to PMS, friends. It will probably get worse before it gets better but maybe it’s just the hormones talking. Maybe I can make a graph of mood swings.

____________________________

I ask you –

How does the Power Bi thing work? I’m googling demos.

(The post Data Circles & Cycles first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

How Judy Blume Did Not Prepare Me

A book I regularly quote and recommend to anyone, especially young female readers, is “Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret” by Judy Blume. Published in 1970, it was a staple in every library. The innocent hilarity and truth to real issues made this book a must read.

So imagine my delight when I read the following: (forgive the language)

As I finished a recent run, the humidity did nothing to alleviate my overheating issues. I sat in front of a fan to cool off while my face felt as if there were waves of heat rolling off my skin. I considered maybe heat stroke had prepared me for eventual perimenopause and my body was finally understanding what it meant to disperse heat. A girl can dream.

The posts may be short but the hot flashes are long.

____________________________

I ask you –

Have you read anything written by Judy Blume?

(The post How Judy Blume Did Not Prepare Me first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

April Recap

Still consistently completing at least one intentional movement session/workout per day. Even some regular 3-per-days! Looks like those midweek dual sessions are a standard occurrence which tells me my workload on those days isn’t as heavy as some others. Or…by the middle of the week, I’m in desperate need for me time. Bingo.

While I was in San Antonio, battling the heat and humidity, Garmin proudly proclaimed my heat acclimatization. It is absolutely wrong but I appreciate the encouragement.

Most days my hair started out contained, even mildly on point. By the end of the day, the alpaca look reigned supreme. I forget the humidity differences between north and central Texas. Glad we’re in May so it can really ramp up.

I didn’t get in a run on the first day of the month, or even the second, but I’m back in a routine. I’ll report back soon! Be very afraid.

___________________________

I ask you –

How was your April?

(The post April Recap first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

99 Years Young

Truly, I believe everyone has those showstopper moments. Those moments in life so powerful they could bring you to your knees, and they run the gamut of emotions. Joy, pain, sorrow, grief. The list is endless.

Aunt Mary Catherine is my showstopper. I’m sure I could name other people or experiences with similar ease yet she was my first. And dare I say best.

These photos mean everything to me. “If pictures were possessions, these would be my most coveted.” I never want to forget the feel of her hand in mine. I never want to forget her smile. I never want to forget the recognition in her eyes despite the inability to verbalize my name. The feel of her lips against my hand as she kissed it countless times, the feel of her soft cheeks against my own lips, the numerous I love you’s back and forth. The love I have for her nearly brings me to tears. But all I could do was smile.

As her voice now fades to a whisper, I promise her to sing with my whole heart, the beautiful, showstopping baritone voice she has but only a memory in my mind. Yet, when I sing, I lift my voice as strongly as hers.

Although some of her sentences were the ramblings of years of thoughts and memories which have become tumbled onto endless paths, her eyes are still so alive with important things to share, observations of an intelligent woman who still desires to serve others.

And her sense of humor is off the charts. She offered to get up from her wheelchair to let me “use the car”. She also said “I reckon we could leave but they might catch us”. Fortunately for the women in my family, and unfortunately for the men, we tend to outlive our counterparts, spouses, and anybody with testosterone.

But if you ask me about the most profound thing she said, I’d tell you this: “I’m waiting on my husband to come get me. He says I’m not done here yet.” Selfishly, I want her here 99 more years. As impossible as it is, every moment with her is a blessing and she is the true heart of love I envisioned when naming mini. My showstoppers.

———————

I ask you –

Who is your showstopper?

Who is the oldest living person in your family?

(The post 99 Years Young first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Moments of Resilience

Turns out I’m allergic to patterned carpet. Dramatic much, Kel. Obviously I’m not allergic. More like averse to it. The patterns are optical and often symmetrical enough to prompt a very dizzying effect. Hotels, classrooms, and educational training sites often utilize this type of carpet which really causes issues with my brain. Or equilibrium. You know what else causes all the sneezing? Beautiful, resilient, blooms, like these flowers. How can something so gorgeous create so many issues?!

CMSgt Fabrienne Burnett

This incredible woman made a few last minute stops on her way to retirement and I was so humbled to be a part of her waypoint. You see, she just returned from deployment in a war-torn, volatile area. Sure, she’s done her fair share of deployments but the emotion I felt in her presence was stained with exhaustion, and dare I say, an undercurrent of hurt. The sheer fact that she took it upon herself to say goodbye rather than fading into R&R without a rear view speaks volumes of her commitment. CMSgt Burnett is one of a kind. I’ve seen some good ones, but she is a great one. And to say she will be missed is an understatement. At a recent commander’s call, our commander asked for a raise of hands to indicate who knew or had been impacted by Chief. Nearly the entire room had a hand raised. As I looked around at the faces of those with their hands up, it was apparent the impression she had made. People were smiling. And that’s what people did when they saw her in her office, out and about, in their spaces. They smiled. She cared. And she will be missed.

All this to say, the empathic part of me accepted her emotions. As the day went on, I kept coming back to those emotions, visible in her eyes and the long hug – needing connection, stability, and a listening ear. The next day, I had grand plans to run, to do things, to be productive. Instead, I couldn’t find the energy. I knew if I didn’t sit with the emotions, my mind and body would eventually force me to do so. When it hits, there’s no pause button, no “please schedule a time…”. So I sat. I rested. I felt. This is the resilience we often speak of. The acknowledgement to ourselves we are strong, even when weak.

Even as the flowers are beautiful, they are equally resilient. If only my nose was the same.

________________

I ask you –

Have you someone in your life who embodies the core of resiliency?

(The post Moments of Resilience first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Ten!

We celebrated 10 years! Instead of the traditional party, we made a quick trip to DFW to eat, shop, and generally create chaos. Success! With cash in hand, Mini made good choices and reckless choices, but her “loot” (as she calls it) was quite satisfying.

A fabulous brunch at The Brunch District in Addison. Truly a best kept secret. Mini’s Eggs Benedict stole the show. Once a girl who avoided anything considered spicy, she has opened her mind and taste buds to new things…and a taste for simple spicy.

We drank a lot of coffee. Of course. The Ninja Kids Adventure Park was also a hit.

And we shopped until we nearly dropped. Better than a party, in my opinion, and so much fun. The experience was worth the drive, the stormy weather, and the very late arrival home.

My sweet 10-yr-old is a happy, kind, beautiful, strong, young lady with an appreciation for fun and chaos. Her wide smile is shared with everyone. And her critical opinions are both humorous and fearsome. As some would say, she’s a hoot!

___________________

I ask you –

Tell me your favorite birthday memory!

(The post Ten! first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

(Belated) February Recap

Courtesy of Strava

In February, my goal was to complete an activity every single day. Whether it be even a simple walk, I wanted to purposefully prioritize daily movement. As it’s also the shortest month, I figured my chance of fulfillment was high. I was not wrong. And, now that I know I can do it, why not start a streak. To March we go!

Any opportunity to seek and find my favorite flowers is an opportunity well done. At the time of this post, the flowers will have continued to grow with more visible blooms and maybe my tulips will have bloomed, too. However, if we don’t get some rain soon there will be no flowers. I heard Texas Tulips was in full bloom the next few weeks…

I recognize we’re partly into March and I’m just now posting this recap. Whoopsies! It’s a short one today. Surprisingly, I’m running low on words. ‘Til next time!

______________________________

I ask you –

Recap your February for me!

(The post (Belated) February Recap first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Outtakes, episode 5

Mini joined me for a rousing room of 3 other participants, complete with a broken thermostat and much running.

An attempt to tame my curls came in the form of these little dinglehoppers, otherwise known as French horns. Ahem, French pins. And a partridge in a pear tree. Or the garbage can, which is where one went after I broke it. It lasted only a few hours in my hair. RIP, French horn. Also, the tutorial exploited its ease of use. It was not.

I was honored to be selected as a judge for lodging’s gingerbread house competition! When I asked for a taste test, I almost lost my judging rights. Next time.

Another week of leave is on the horizon. Ahem, now. There will be no gingerbread house creation. Instead, upwards of 75 degrees is forecasted. I have no doubt the winter weather will come soon though. Merry Christmas Eve!

_____________________

I ask you –

Have you ever eaten a gingerbread house post-decoration?

(The post Outtakes, episode 5 first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Get Cookin’

For a long week, I was under the weather. Big thanks to Texas for its pseudo-winter/summer fluctuations. When in doubt, drink it out. Hmmmm doesn’t sound correct. Nothing a little rum can’t fix.

I attended a squadron Christmas Social, complete with a fashion show and giveaways. I won a candle! Despite my best preparation, including sitting as far away as possible from the dessert table, once the first cookie snuck past my lips, I was done. 7 cookies later…no judgment, please

To balance out the cookies, I gave up on pre-packaged granola. It was full of crap! And expensive! Now I make my own: almonds, pistachios, pecans/walnuts, and cinnamon. I eat it daily so I guess you could say it’s really good.

You know the 8.5×11 inch baking dishes? I made pan cookies, filling that baby side to side with delicious cookie dough, then baking it to perfection. In 7 days, I (nearly singlehandedly) ate the entire dish of cookies. The entire 8.5×11 inch pan. To my defense, I made them with gluten-free flour (for Parts) and fake sugar (for me). That knocks off about 5 calories.

I’ll get my life together. After I devour all the sweets in this house. Surely I’m helping someone else’s restraint. Surely?

_____________________

I ask you –

When was the last time you polished off some cookies?

(The post Get Cookin’ first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)