Therefore, on the day of our fearless unit leader returning to his rightful throne, aka big messy desk, I thought it fitting to mark his homecoming with a post. After all, he did hire me, unbeknownst to his well-being.
Fortunately for you all this post really isn’t about him. Exhale.
It’s about all the cool things I’ve done lately, you know, with all my spare time and non-demanding job requirements. Right. Those things.
Returned to my first sport love: volleyball! I voluntold my coworkers that we were playing and they indulged me. This is fun! Note: a well developed running base sure does make volleyball a lot easier. What doesn’t make volleyball fun? A bandaged toe from racing a General (he didn’t know we were racing but of course we were) and the oft overlooked but no less important underboob. Well, the chafing of the underboob was the problem. Anyway, if you’re still reading after the mention of underboob – said three times now – then welcome to Running on Fumes, where we (and by we I mean I) type the ridiculous things that come to mind.
Fairly sure there was a point to this post.
Oh. Right. Cool things. I did stand out in the blazing heat giving out tickets to a drawing held by Spare Parts and the team of fabulous marketing folks who make all my wildest creative dreams come true. Mostly posters and schedules because I’m not creative at all. Also, I packed up an entire event’s worth of stuff in about 6 mins flat at the mention of severe thunderstorm, lightning, and hail. Did I already state it was hotter than jalapeno cornbread? They supplied me with multiple bottles of cold water, I worked for free. Until next year.
I ask you –
What’s your favorite sport? I particularly like curling.
Is it still cool where you live or getting hot?
Tell me your thoughts on cornbread! Yuck. Not a fan.
It takes a lot but occasionally I’m genuinely surprised at someone or something. Most recently, it was both. A woman whom I know from several joint interests told me she reads my blog. Fan girl moment. I was actually shocked. You wouldn’t know it by my kind smile and charming wit though. haHA! Of all the things this woman could read, she chooses to read my silliness. For real, I’m a complete fruitcake, a whackadoo, a few crayons short of a poster, or however that saying goes. Keep up here. AND she said she enjoyed it. I’m hyperventilating right now.
While I’m on an off-season training cycle (for 2 more years, but who’s counting), I decided to play around with different training styles, i.e. heart rate training, etc. I’ve never put much stock into HR training but why not. Turns out it’s difficult to slow down and run in the “easy” HR category. Not sure how my watch picked this for me.
Seriously. It’s like 2 mins slower than my slowest pace. Is that right? I read somewhere you should be able to converse when running easy. I could definitely do that. In fact, I could’ve made dinner and probably tap danced during it. S.L.O.W. But I guess we’ll try this for awhile to see what happens.
You know what irritates me? So glad you asked. The presumptuousness of weather people. And I quote… “The last of the nice days is today. This weekend it will be unseasonably cooler with highs in the 60s and considerably cloudier.” Listen, buddy with your fancy meteorologist degree, how dare you assume the 60s are not nice and that I don’t like cloudy days. Maybe this is my idea of nice. Just because it wasn’t 90° in late April doesn’t mean I’m unhappy. Personally, I’d like to skip the Satan’s skillet portion of the year. I’m truly happy you asked.
I ask you –
Have you ever practiced heart rate training? If so, do you have any pointers?
“Your expectations lead to your disappointment.” At least, that’s what I heard right before my phone started ringing one early morning with work issues.
Shortly afterwards, I was ruing every small step toward agreeing to be a supervisor. It will be fun, they said. You have so much experience, they also said. It’s not that hard. Right. Where is this fun I was promised? Excuse me, I’m ready for the fun part. Maybe fun isn’t the most accurate depiction of what I’m looking for. But I don’t really know.
Unrelated: Is “foot stomp” a redundancy? Because stomping implies using the feet. During a training session last week, I guess to reiterate the material, the speaker said “foot stomp” at least 3 times. Now I can’t help but to wonder if it’s another one of those buzzwords the military and society in general likes to use. Excessively.
This is the final week of classes. A glorious 10 days of no school work awaits me. My hope is by the time this post is published I will have submitted the final discussion post replies and put away all my textbooks. Except for the one I have to return. Note to self: figure that part out pronto. I’m escaping reality for a few short days and then I shall return refreshed for another 8 weeks of papers.
Barring how many telephone calls I receive for advice and complaints. Join the club. Somebody has to do it.
I ask you –
Do your expectations actually lead to your disappointments?
Only in Texas in December has it been so dry we still have leaves on the trees. But they finally changed colors in preparation for a good windstorm to blow them away. Minus the tornado/severe storm watch mid-month. Someone else said hang on to your stockings.
In related news, or maybe not, we didn’t have internet for about 24 hrs so my paper writing was a little delayed. The final one of the semester. Good thing I took off a half day just to write. And attend school Christmas parties. And attend Christmas dance performances. Then…Rest. Yeah right. I chugged some coffee and went back to work – figuratively.
The training bases within the Air Force practice (celebrate?) a time of year titled Exodus. As a Biblical term, it means exactly what it sounds like…the great Exodus of many technical training students during the holidays. Widely celebrated by most activities on base, Exodus is a time of liberal leave and a general relaxation as there are not as many people to serve. Lucky for my crew it means a prolonged period of clean up and clean out! In fact, while our activity is shut due to low volume, I’m ramping up the schedule and completing all types of staff training there’s never enough time for. It’s gonna be fun! By the time everyone returns, the staff will be happy to be back to regular work.
My hope is to have a post-Christmas and pre-New Year celebration with the staff. Hence, all the food!
2022 is down to the wire. For many, it’s probably cause for celebration. Not sure exactly how I feel about it yet but time doesn’t standstill for me. Back to the drawing board.
I ask you –
Has your weather been average or just plain wild?
Do you experience a lull in business or work during the holidays?
Tell me something you have going on in the lead up to 2023! Reading books!
Back to South Padre Island we went! It’s sad I had to go to the beach to see any measurable rain. Speaking of rain, all of Texas is so dry. We encountered no less than a dozen burnt patches of land between N. TX and the island. Also a full-blown fire in progress. Send rain.
We spent a lot of time at the pool and a similar amount of time in the ocean. 7 bottles of sunscreen later…
Landshark is my go-to. No idea why I like it but I only drink it at the beach. South Padre’s proximity to Mexico is an invitation for the spiciest, most authentic tacos in the world. And since I can’t resist cilantro, I purchased some Cilantro Sauce at the local Farmer’s Market then proceeded to eat it at every meal. I’m on vacation.
Speaking of food, I also ate my weight in fish and limes. Oh, and gelato. I ate a lot of that, too. Really I only ate a lot of gelato because I was the designated driver on vacation and responsible for picking up our meals. So when asked to deliver gelato, I charged adequate tax on my Uber eats-esque services. One bite for me, one bite for you. Fair is fair. It was 90°, as well, so there’s that.
When in Rome… seeing as how it was quite cooler than North Texas, I took everyone’s advice and brought my running shoes! Somehow I only had to look at the sand and suddenly it was inside my socks. Magic. Between early morning runs and coffee 2-3x a day, I’m the most relaxed I’ve been all year.
I would share more, but there’s a stack of laundry to be done and I still have to de-sand our beach accessories. I feel a procrastinap coming on.
I ask you –
Did you vacation this year? Where?
Have you encountered an extra dry season?
Tell me how much laundry you do when you return from a trip. Avg 3 loads.
Then I decided to channel my inner woman of the wild and become a canning master! Next up: living in a hut and churning my own butter. Right. I know.
As a writer, grammar and spelling are important to me, as well as consistent fonts across a document. It’s my job. I appreciate when someone’s email signature line is short, concise, and, most importantly, legible! You may be asking how an email could possibly be anything other than legible; rest assured, I’ve seen it all. It’s not pretty.
Full disclosure: I don’t believe everything I read on the internet. Tell me you don’t either. So I did my own research. Turns out it is true!
My dreamer mindset got a little excited, to tell the truth. But as for adding it to the bucket list? No thanks. The part that negated all my dreams was “The real-life walk would be grueling, filled with scary animals and diversely bad weather.” Nope, nope, and nope. Next, please.
I ask you –
What’s your Strava information? Please comment below. I need friends!
Have you ever canned anything? What should I can next?
Change of plans. Nothing says get it together, Kel like a wake up call from your body, specifically when you’re too stubborn to acknowledge the signs before the fall. If that isn’t cryptic enough, let’s just say I got a little too close to the same experience nearly 4 yrs ago when I took an ambulance ride for suspected heat stroke. Coupled with poor fueling, I know better. And here we are. Unless the heat wave and triple digit temps break soon, the remainder of my summer will be spent on the treadmill. Surrounded by fans. Yay Texas.
I paused my training plan because I don’t desire to run 6 miles on the belt of doom. Possible, yes. Will… negative. However, I did see where there are a few upcoming breaks in the heat and MAYBE I can get outside one morning for a run. Perhaps I should have considered my running goals when considering Texas as a living option. I heard Utah was beautiful nearly year-round. Ehhh elevation isn’t my favoriteeither. I could use a summer home and a winter home. Let me get right on it.
My sister put it this way: “I have a few demands for going into the gates of hell this weekend! I need an ice pack, enough deodorant to bathe in and a fan!!! 😂😂😂👍🏻” Don’t we all. On the bright side, it “should” only be low 90s for the first part of this week which means it “might” be upper 60s on the overnights soooooo maybe I can run in the early mornings. Maybe yes, maybe no.
I ask you –
Are you currently training for anything?
Do you have a seasonal home? Mind if I borrow it?
Tell me your essentials to surviving unbearable heat! Ice cream!
I shared my body, my peace of mind, my time, my humor, my breakfast/lunch/dinner/snacks, and my personal space with her. I’m not sharing my cookie! P.S. I sat in my car alone and ate the ENTIRE cookie.
Then I did something nice (read: made plans, changed other’s plans, rescheduled the changed plans, updated the newest plans) for a group of people and they thanked me with Girl Scout cookies.
The following emoji indicates the remainder of May’s weather: 🥵 I can’t run outside in this. I can’t even walk! All. Month. Long. My fear is if it’s this hot in May, what will July look like? Please send us rain.
And, like any half-brained person in the midst of triple digit temperatures, I scheduled a Day of Service volunteer opportunity for 2 squadrons and 1 group. AF lingo. I’m supremely pleased with the turnout – 18 people – and the nearly 10 full bags of trash we removed from the sides of a 2-mile stretch of highway. I can’t speak for other states, but Texas has the Adopt-a-Highway program where organizations can “adopt” a stretch of public highway. The intent is for each organization to host quarterly cleanup days to maintain Texas roadways. Admittedly, I had no idea my squadron owned a piece of land until a few weeks ago so my tentative plan is to offer a volunteer opportunity twice a year. Read: when it’s cold outside and the threat of snakes is virtually nonexistent.
Oh hell no! If you need me, I’ll be anxiously scanning every piece of dry land for slithering inhabitants. Texas, please stop being so difficult.
I ask you –
Do you hide from your children when eating snacks? You can lie to me but not to yourself!
Does your state have something similar to the Adopt-a-Highway program?
Snakes: “look, friends” or “run for your life”! Obviously – run for the hills screaming like a banshee.
I’m 5 weeks into a long 10k training plan and it still blows my mind how I ran a sub 10 min/mile avg for over 13 miles just 5 months ago. And it was awesome! Now? I’m barely sustaining a 11:30 min/mile for a 5k.
Whoever talked so highly about a comeback was a liar. What’s this comeback you speak of? Because I sure haven’t seen it yet. The only thing coming back is my level of discipline. Although work is really trying hard to throw me off. Anyway – 10k. It doesn’t feel possible I’ll ever get there. On the bright side, most knee pain has all but disappeared. Sometimes there’s a twinge, occasionally it’s a little more than a twinge, but I’m reminded this is normal and may just be a lifelong effect of a torn anything. A run last week reminded me I’ve come a long way and not to be too hard on myself. Still weird though.
In April, I also faced a different kind of giant…the celebration of my great Aunt Mary Catherine’s 95th birthday! She’s no giant. But the revere and awe I am of her is bigger than life. You’d think she’d stop falling for these surprise birthday parties, but it worked again. Her big smile, bigger heart, and sweet words make my soul sing. She is a giant in my eyes – of the most tender loving kind I’ve ever known. Many relatives, family friends, and neighbors were there to share in her day. I even convinced her to eat two pieces of cake. It wasn’t difficult.
Mini finagled her way into Rubik’s cube lessons with my uber-smart cousin.
We also had time to take Bluebonnet photos on the side of the highway. This was near where I had the car accident 2 yrs ago so it felt good to find something beautiful near a place I’m not fond of.
Giants aren’t always scary, looming creatures; sometimes they’re just small stepping stones. Other times, they’re the people you love the most whom are giant in your eyes.
I ask you –
Are you currently training for anything? Survival counts!