You have been summoned

Random: I believe when one shares their playlist or music interests, it is an intimate act built on trust and reciprocation. You are allowed a glimpse into their mood, emotions, behavior not easily recognized by words alone. For example, my sister plays very rage-y, anti-people music when I’m with her. And I noticed she’s much happier when she’s not around me. Huh.

Reality: I received a jury summons and, try as I might, I was unable to be excused. In fact, they rejected my reasoning flat out. Fine, it wasn’t that great of an excuse. As interesting as this particular incredibly important civic duty is, my work schedule all but threw a hissy fit when I read the summons date. In fact, my words were somewhere along the lines of you have got to be kidding me, I do not have time for this! Oh right, Kel, because the accused must have considered the inconvenience to you.

It is almost unbelievable I’ve never received a jury summons. I don’t believe I’m the type of person that counselors want in their jury pool, but we shall see. At the time of this post, I’ll be patiently waiting to be “called” back or whatever they do.

Despite the terrible timing, maybe this is a good way to bolster my blog fodder. Are there any rules on soliciting readers? What about social experiments in the jury pool? How mad would the judge be if I brought my own gavel? Can I take some stock photos of the courtroom?

____________________________

I ask you –

Who can I ask these important questions?

(The post You have been summoned first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Cooperation: necessary

The mental prompt: I was walking behind a woman while grocery shopping. Her shirt said something about supporting those seeking organ transplants.

The mental reaction: How angry would I be if I saw the recipient of one of my organs smoking, chronically eating unwell, and/or not exercising?

Answer: I would be livid. How dare someone take my free gift and not treat it like a priceless artifact.

Disclosure: I don’t know how often this happens but with morbidity and obesity rates what they are, I would not be surprised.

Let’s just do better, ok?

Not one to skimp on the “find some random crap to do every day”, I noticed my hips getting tighter. Could it be getting older? Could it be my running regimen, or lack thereof? Could it be the strength training splits? Maybe it’s Maybelline. I have zero idea, but, in an effort to mitigate the effects, I started stretching a bit more.

The forward fold really sucks. You won’t find me saying how much I love it, because I would be lying. Why not add a yoga block to the stretch to make it even tougher and more loathsome? Sure, why not. Yet the results cannot be denied. It hurts so good! The hips don’t lie. If only everyone could truly appreciate how funny I am.

____________________________

I ask you –

What’s your idea of a fun time? Tell me it, too, is learning a new stretch and repeating it daily until the muscle cooperates.

(The post Cooperation: necessary first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Reality Check + 5th Grade Draft

Another school year is upon us and I have a 5th grader! Yesterday she was in kindergarten so pardon me while I have a few nervous breakdowns. Who has just one?!

“Lately, it is difficult to tell who is winning the season as the draft picks are becoming trickier.” – a quote I made up by an unknown educator

Still, I’m convinced of my draft suspicions.

The first day went well. Eerily well. For now, excitement rings around having her own locker (top, because she’s tall), taking a snack because they have a late lunch, and her new class friend, a girl whose name I’ve never heard mentioned before. For now, everyone gets along and there is cohesion. It also helped the homework doesn’t really begin until week 2. Oh joy.

Somehow the summer flew by, but I’m hanging on to pool weekends for as long as possible. The weather is cooperative, boasting double digit days in the triple digits. Outside can best be described as “blow dryer with a turbo setting”. Truly, it’s so much fun.

I keep telling myself the heat will break soon and the perfect running temps (60 and below, please) will return. Again, this summer has probably been one of my best for still completing lift sessions outdoors…in the afternoons, no less! I credit the creatine/electrolyte mix coupled with the aforementioned pool recovery. Still, fall is just around the corner. On the other block, lost and confused, slightly inebriated.

____________________________

I ask you –

Anyone else anticipating fall weather?

(The post Reality Check + 5th Grade Draft first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Maybe I’m a Toys”R” Us Kid

As part of a leadership engagement cohort, with 12 other fabulous leading role models, one of the recent assignments was to reevaluate my individual development plan (or IDP). Might I digress for just a moment to say everyone should attend some kind of cohort of people striving to be their best. In 4 weeks, there’s been crying, laughing, cursing, and complaining. I highly recommend it!

Focus, Kel.

As a government civilian, having an approved IDP is just one of the many requirements. It is even a requirement for my team, most of whom are paid from a different pot of money yet also considered government employees. I know many people think an IDP is a colossal waste of time, that no one looks at them, and less take them seriously. Not I. I enjoy going over it with my employees as it provides a snapshot of their future plans, goals, and aspirations.

Between 2020 and 2024, my long-term goal was a PhD. In 2025, I moved it to the short term section. Now? I have a few blanks to fill.

What do I want to be when I grow up?

I love asking this question to transitioning service members, soon-to-be retirees, and anyone else on the cusp of life choices. I love how it implies we’re all growing up, and we have a vast world of options to explore. Because we do!

So I asked myself what do I want to be when I grow up? And a list developed.

1. Teach. I adore education and academia. I love to learn. I’d go back to college tomorrow.

2. There’s a specific job I look up from time to time. It’s a position I accidentally stumbled upon many years ago, but knew it was not the opportunity for me then. It won’t be an opportunity for several more years because it requires deployment cycles, travel, and a move. But it gets my heart beating overtime when I see it. I get that excited rush contemplating what it could do for my career, my mental health, and definitely my physical presence. Introducing the Fit Boss, and its fun equivalent, the Fun Boss. These are real titles. These roles assign you to a Navy big deck and send you out with 3,000 of your closest friends to maintain fitness, health, and MWR-related activities and requirements while deployed. One day, I’ll be a Fit Boss.

3. Entrepreneur. I want to open a running store / coffee house / bakery. I recognize these ideas may not align; however, tis my dream.

I’ll keep adding as I see fit, as my interests change, and/or as life gets more life-ier. Who knows. Maybe there’s an opportunity for a Fit Boss Coach Baker.

____________________________

I ask you –

Tell me – what do you want to be when you grow up?

(The post Maybe I’m a Toys”R” Us Kid first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Smart Choices

I once thought how I’d love to have back my 16-yr-old body. Not a care in the world, could live on Snickers and bad decisions. And I did. But then I think of what my body has done for me – I realize the one I have now is absolutely perfect. I’m in awe of this body. It birthed a child. It carries me to and fro with ease. It reacts so positively when I nourish it. There’s something special about the word nourishment. More than eating, it requires nourishment. I nourish my mind, body, and soul. It rejoices.

Yogurt + blueberries = my daily standby

The salads that Mini makes fun of me for eating daily are truly fulfilling to my body. When I think about why I love them so much, I recall visiting Aunt Mary Catherine’s home and she always had a green salad with lunch. Always! I loved her simple green salad. And it was never referenced as a “salad”; it was a “green salad”. Probably vice fruit salad or ambrosia salad. Which are magical in their own way.

In this age of convenience, a salad is not. In fact, salads are expensive which proves a barrier to families with limited or strict incomes. Salads could even be considered rich-people food. I’m not rich but my body demands this rich person food. Enriching, if you will.

Sleep is also a favorite self-gift. I’ve found, through diligent research, that my body reacts the best when it receives 9 hours of sleep. Now, before anyone acts shocked, I’ve had an 8:30pm bedtime for nearly my entire life.

Notwithstanding the bed time, research (the real kind) indicates a full sleep cycle lasts about 90 mins which means 9 hrs of sleep grants about 6 full REM cycles. In my opinion, it is why I nearly always remember my dreams each morning. A full cycle grants me the ability to fall into a natural REM cycle where I awake in the proper stage to remember my dreams.

I’m no doctor…wait. I am!…but anecdotal evidence is evidence nonetheless!

____________________________

I ask you –

What is your average sleep cycle?

What foods do you find nourishing?

(The post Smart Choices first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

July Recap!

A recent commander’s call resulted in the following phrase: Rise to expectations, fall to discipline. I saw many head-nods in the crowd, but I didn’t exactly understand what the phrase meant. It sounded pretty catchy. Indeed, I went looking.

Turns out, some Greek dude named Archilochus stated, “We don’t rise to the level of our expectations, we fall to the level of our training”. Same, same. Essentially, our daily behaviors are more meaningful to producing change than a one-off situation or experience.

Which is the perfect segue for this post! Ta-da!

If only you could understand how many times I change post titles, words, captions, and questions, this might not be surprising. Why, thank you, Word Press, for acknowledging my skills!

According to Strava, I missed 2 days in July, but I don’t recall the circumstances surrounding it. I swear I didn’t miss any days. Oh well.

In other news, and I know I touched on it before, but I had a helluva 5-week training cycle!

I was able to update my benchmarks for all 4 lifts. Amazing what discipline does in 9 months. But I also must give credit where credit is due. The creatine makes a huge difference. The fog has lifted, my strength performance has improved (as evidenced by the PRs), and, overall, I feel like me. Sure, the words don’t always come to me, but I’m learning to give myself some much-needed grace.

____________________________

I ask you –

How was your July?

(The post July Recap! first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

REPOST! Leadership 101

A repost from October 13, 2025, just as the furlough was beginning, at a time I still had good spirits. Things changed fast, didn’t they? Anyway, I’m recovering from the island life so bear with me as I continue sorting laundry, vacuuming endless amounts of sand, and remembering how to work with people. I’ll be back in full force soon!

A few forgotten things about leadership:

The potential you see in others means nothing without their buy-in. If they don’t want it for themselves, it’s a brutal lesson in futility. Yours.
You will spend more time at work than with your own family over the course of a lifetime. Best love what you do. And surround yourself with the right people.
Do not expect others to care the way you do. Alternately, you may not care the way they do. It’s ok.
It weighs a lot because it is insanely lonely at the top. The sleepless nights, the fights with other decision makers, the balance never found. You probably won’t have any friends and, if you do, watch out for perception. I am not inclined.

A lovely friend sent me the following graphic after she proudly exclaimed how I had “grown a pair”.

What she does not realize is for every day my “pair” swings, I have just as many softer moments, where I’m reminded to fight the good fight means not acting like a complete arsehole and picking my battles. Forever, a work in progress.

________________

I ask you –

What is your toughest leadership challenge?

(The post Leadership 101 first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

REPOST! Kindness is not Convenient

Another repost while I bask in the sunshine and salt water of island life. This post was a little special to me because I’m constantly reminding myself what I bring to the table. Hope you enjoy it!

“I sell pizza.”

That’s my new motto. Three seemingly small words which indicate a new heartfelt response. Epiphany? Maybe. Rebranding? Sort of. Reframe? Bingo.

I sell pizza. I don’t sell ice cream, or hotdogs, or juice boxes, or hamburgers, or any other version of convenient foods. Pizza. That’s what I sell.

What does this even mean?

Photo by Almira on Pexels.com

It means –

I don’t owe a dime and I don’t have to do anything. I owe it to myself to establish clear, direct boundaries. No further explanation. No long-winded and easily misconstrued version of trauma which led to…blah blah blah.

For some, pizza is the Michelin star in perfect triangular form. It can be customized, dressed up, transformed into an award winning dish. The pizza I sell? Cheese. I sell cheese pizza. Not because I’m boring or don’t want to put in the effort, but because cheese pizza is tried and true. It’s the basics. The foundation of pizza. Cheese.

You’ve probably figured out I’m going somewhere with this schpill. You are, right? When tested, I easily revert back to foundational principles – kindness often mistaken as weakness, or I shut down completely. Rarely do I come out fighting. All noble reactions yet kindness has not served me too well. Good thing kindness isn’t for you, Kel. Kindness is a reflection of the heart. It’s a desire to do better, be better, give others grace. It’s not easy. People test, they try, they dig in their heels, they make messes where no mess should ever be. At some point, kindness is overshadowed, and those without boundaries are the first to succumb.

Not this time. Not to the lady who sells pizza. Kindness is no longer a convenience, it’s a requirement. To be part of my world, kindness is a non-negotiable. Just because I sell pizza does not mean I will sell it to you.

Cheers to holding the line. And selling a damn good pizza pie.

_____________________

I ask you –

Did I miss any analogies?

(The post Kindness is not Convenient first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Choices

On the cusp of vacation, I remind myself to set clear boundaries regarding my time away. Work: true emergencies only, don’t forget you have a mandatory 2-hr teams call. Home: ehhh, Parts has it. Fun: enjoy every second!

The (partial) team!

Which leads me to a topic I know I’ve previously discussed on RoF. Two words: decision fatigue.

I don’t know the average number of decisions one makes a day, but I bet I outpace the average. By at least a hundred. As a leader, it’s expected and applauded to make decisions. I got it. Oftentimes, however, that role bleeds over into every other part of my life. And it’s tiring. I would still give the same percentage to my job even if I wasn’t being paid, but there is a level of expectation to relax while away from work, to simplify, to rest.

Perhaps I should approve a yes moratorium during vacation to combat the decision fatigue I will inevitably feel obligated to address. I’ll just say yes to everything. What do you want to eat? What time are we…? Do you want to stop here? How many minutes until…? When are we leaving? Where are we going? Have you…? Should we…?

Yes. The answer is yes. Does it truly answer a fraction of the questions? Meh. But the answer is yes! It never fails that at least a dozen instances will arise where I just remind everyone I, too, am on vacation and would really love to enjoy myself.

No more questions, please. Just yes.

____________________________

I ask you –

Is the most exhausting part of your day the decision-making?

(The post Choices first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Mission Accomplished

A few weeks ago, Parts excitedly told me at 40 I needed to start having annual mammograms. So I scheduled one. TMI I’m not sure how this all works with the diminutive size of my breast material but whatever.

I’m still a little bitter that Parts told me I had to have one. But shouldn’t she, too? We could have made this a joint activity!

On the anticipated mammogram day, I figured out how it worked. It will forever be known as “The great smash and dash!” Which oddly sounds like I’m committing a felony and is truly exciting.

Behold! My boob!

Ok, if you don’t think it’s funny that I’m making jokes about having a mammogram, then I’m sorry; feel free to never read my posts ever again. Yes, I am aware of the seriousness of breast cancer as I have a very close friend currently in the throes of chemotherapy which will be followed by surgery, then culminating in radiation. It’s serious. And my heart hurts for her. I am not making light of her situation, or anyone else’s. However, if you know me well, you know I have the absolute worst sense of humor when it comes to serious things, like death, funerals, and, now, mammograms. It’s my coping mechanism. Could be worse, maybe?

Fortunately, the results indicated no issues except a gentle warning I have dense breast tissue and I have been granted a reprieve until next year.

Other things -:

The week of the great smash and dash included the great grab and smash. I’m onto something.

100 lbs – Deadlift

70 lbs – Overhead Press

For context, 100 lbs is approx 70% of my bodyweight. And I’ve never lifted anything close to 70 lbs over my head. This “realization phase” was quite a success!

A week of reloading, then a week completely off from everything. Except running, of course. Then, I’ll start another 5-week routine.

Wash, rinse, repeat.

____________________________

I ask you –

For my mammary-beholden friends, have you completed your annual mammogram?

(The post Mission Accomplished first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)