Casual Requests

It’s been said – by me – the issue which originally prompts seeking counseling/therapy/(whatever misnomer you choose) is not the true issue. Sure, it is probably an issue, but the underlying stuff heavily influences that particular issue and until some of it is resolved, then the issue will continue.

It’s psychology 101. Really. Human nature merges emotions with feelings and physical stuff. It plays out nearly daily in our personal and professional interactions. I have no desire to judge; however, my professional position warrants evaluating the mission’s needs with simple ability to do the job. Believe it or not, it can get very nasty when emotions overpower logic. Who needs common sense anyway.

In nearly every conversation with myself, and with others, I seek peace. Sure, it would be ideal on a global scale but many a hearts have changed when starting on a small scale. It’s called incrementalism. I think of it often, daily, continuously. Peace…in my heart, mind, and life. I can sense I’m getting close. Still waiting, somewhat more patiently than usual.

Lastly, if I could use this, I would.

Please – tell me what you think can be revealed that is so damaging to my reputation.

Please – because I’m well aware of my unpleasant past and I’d like to make sure the story is correct.

Please – do tell which stone you intend to throw so I may point you to the weakest window.

Please – paint your picture of beauty and sunshine so I can be the villain in your story.

Please – don’t forget to leave a comment because you can kiss my…forgiving heart and war-strengthened resolve…goodbye.

_________________

I ask you –

Do you have any requests to add?

(The post Casual Requests first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Defining Moments

I am sure everyone has small, unsuspecting yet defining moments to reference who/why they are the way they are. The title came to me when considering mini’s recent dance recital. Subsequent thoughts traversed from her love of dance and performing arts to my lack thereof. Instead, I thought back to a moment where I stood on a makeshift stage, speech in hand, ready to convince my entire middle school I deserved to be elected into the student council. I recall spending days forming my speech and reading it to my dad. It was good. If I do say so myself.

But after 2 students ahead of me, listening to their brief and not entirely convincing schpill, I second guessed myself. When it was my turn, I said my name, said please elect me, and quickly exited. Talk about disappointment. When my name was not called for the electees, it was no big surprise. But it was at that moment I knew I would not minimize myself again for something I truly wanted.

Hip Hop

Fast forward. A singular moment in time shaped me. Just as you, loyal readers, have similar (or vastly different) experiences, these moments shape, erode, and refine. It’s fascinating how one experience can have lifelong effects. Mini will seemingly always love dance. She’s good at it, and if dancing doesn’t take her where she wants to be, assuredly her sass will.

Credit: IG

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I ask you –

Share a time you didn’t bring your A-game.

(The post Defining Moments first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Picking it back up

I didn’t realize I really only spent 6 years of my life in the “white house”, the now dilapidated, overgrown photo in the bottom left corner (above). Just 6 years. Yet somehow those years, although formidable, encompass a vast amount of trauma, memories, and pieces of my life I spent a majority running from.

RoF has captured my time “back home”. Since it’s been several weeks now from the last time I visited, the picture (no pun intended) is much clearer in my mind. I love how family still lives near and have molded new lives of their own, with beautiful memories which add to my collection. Mini and I discuss my dad and other parts of the family; however, I’m hesitant to share too much as it’s not her burden to carry.

Fortunately, I believe I’m in a good place in life to acknowledge a memory then release it. The book awaits. As I haven’t tried writing in years, soon it will be time to proverbially pick up the pen again. As new memories dull the sharpness of unpleasant ones, I’m mindful not to wait too long.

_________________

I ask you –

Have you started writing a book/novel/short story to be derailed for a lengthy amount of time?

(The post Picking it back up first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Ohhhhh, San Diego

Because the line was so long, approx 27 people with the average wait time of 52 minutes, I have no photos of the incredible ice cream at An’s Electronics Repair. At this point, An’s has invested in dry cleaning, hat making, and, now, electronics. What a marketing and business genius. The truth is she has the very best ice cream in…anywhere. You should partake at every single location, as I have.

Cookies were the theme of this jaunt to San Diego. Coco and Jules Cookies were my favorite, while Cookie Plug was trying a little too hard. But did I eat the cookies? Well, yes.

Tacos, coffee, and chicken pot pie rounded out the menu. Turns out I’m not a fan of chicken pot pie. I know others who adore it. Just not me.

Tacos El Gordo

Breakfast Republic

Acento Coffee

The Chicken Pie Shop

Quite the successful and relaxing trip. I managed 3 runs and 1 workout. I’d gladly pay extra to have San Diego weather year-round. In fact, the first run back in Texas was a glorious disaster. From heat and humidity to stiff muscles and uncertain hydration status, I was a walking risk. Alas, it will return.

__________________________

I ask you –

If you’ve been to San Diego – name your favorite places there! Food, too!

(The post Ohhhhh, San Diego first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Aware(ness) v Care(ness)

I have a brilliant idea to make the government millions of dollars. Every time someone drives on the installation while colors plays, they must pay a fine. At least $100.

Leadership lesson 101: Take your weaknesses and delegate them! At least, that’s the moral of the story I took from it.

For the last several months, every Friday at work, something strange has happened in my presence. From an active shooter situation to a fire alarm to, most recently, the mule (Kawasaki-type, not animal-type) catching fire while I was driving it – you can see the common denominator is me. Yours truly. It’s become a running joke about how something happens to me every Friday. I’m beginning to think people are avoiding me, if not for my reputation then definitely for fear of being tangled up in my shenanigans. Who could blame them?

So long as I’m not driving a vehicle on base, I am very trustworthy! One year you’re the best supervisor in AETC, the next you’re a pyro. Geez, how the mighty fall. At the time of this post, the damage repair costs were nearly $1,000. Maybe I’ll set up my own check points to charge people who drive during colors. Then, I can put the money toward my fitness financial losses.

Every time my team pulls off a big event, I think damn these guys are incredible. Do you know why I win awards? Because of them. Do you know why they win awards? Because of themselves. We have our fair share of faults and I could probably write a training curriculum on what not to do. But, at the end of the day, this team is amazing. They’ve always been amazing. They just needed someone to believe in them. And show them how to be leaders. I will never stop being amazed at what they are able to accomplish. Because we all know I couldn’t do half of what they do. I’m a figurehead. Yet I lead from the front. And I feel confident and secure enough to say I know if I said follow me, they would, not because I said it but because they trust me.

________________

I ask you –

By all means, feel free to comment on the disasters which plague me.

(The post Aware(ness) v Care(ness) first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Another Indicator of my Stellar Education

Allow me to share a story of my unimaginable stupidity. I’m quite literally the smartest idiot you’ll ever meet. Hands down

via IG

At a recent small group event I like to call Geriatric Game Night, I retrieved a tiny slip of paper from a bowl on the table and prepared to draw a picture of the word(s) for my fellow gamers to guess. As hard as I tried, I could not decipher the word. I rotated the paper all manners of degree. No luck. Finally, I turned to my right, to the woman who had contributed the word, and asked her what the word was. She rewarded me with the nicest “Are you dumb?” look, then mouthed the word to me.

Top hat. Top hat was the word. Top hat. Not tophat. Pronounced in my head as toe-fat. Tophat is indeed not a real word. You’ll be shocked to know it’s not a Biblical term or a word to describe an Egyptian or anyone else. Tophat is not a real word. Not today, not tomorrow, probably not ever.

You can imagine my internal monologue as well as the laughs from every gamer when I explained my mistake. To think I have a PhD is almost preposterous.

Admittedly, I am incredibly dumb with common situations, words, and items. Remember the time I walked around outside with a vape in my hand? I thought it was a pretty pink battery! At least people laugh with me. Or at me.

_________________

I ask you –

Share your moment(s) of stupidity with me!

I’m thinking of stopping the questions part of these posts. Maybe just one or two here and there. Thoughts?

(The post Another Indicator of my Stellar Education first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Favorites

I’m officially in love with cherry limeades, specifically the sugar-free ones I make at home. Incredibly refreshing!

JoJo’s

I’m addicted to JoJo’s chocolates. In fact, I have three large to medium sized plastic containers filled with different options. Not pictured: chocolate covered pretzels.

Parlor Donuts

I believe Parlor Donuts are the United States’ best kept secret. I said it here first. They offer both keto and gluten-free options. No one I know does this! Although the keto version (top photo) is more “cakey”, it was sweet without being overly, weirdly sweet. The bottom two were also incredible. Because I couldn’t not take a bite. And they offer coffee, which is a must with sweet donuts.

Rebel Pistachio

I love the Rebel brand, and each flavor is good. However, Pistachio is the best of the best. So good, in fact, I had it 2 nights in a row. Big deal.

_________________

I ask you –

Of the list above, have you tried any?

What is your favorite donut brand?

Thoughts on keto/lower sugar ice cream.

(The post Favorites first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

TX – AR – TN – KY

Sights and sounds of a road trip through Arkansas, then Tennessee, and the southern part of Kentucky.

I will say this was one of the most fun trips I’ve taken. However, the road trips which stand above them all were the ones to the Texas border cities. Yes, some might balk at the selfishness of my thoughts but I still can’t explain my gratefulness to strangers for sharing their lives and their reality with me, also a stranger, an outsider with a desire to write what they gave me.

We turned a 20+ year retirement event into a 5-day road trip, complete with food, coffee (tons of coffee), and shopping. Participating in a Naval retirement flag detail is a big deal. Quite the honor actually. So, when mini’s dad asked me to be the final part of the detail – delivering the U.S. flag to mini – I had some initial reservations because hello, wild card. But I quickly realized it was a big deal to him and, one day, it will be to her. Upon acceptance, I didn’t fully understand the logistics of said trip and all the little parts which make it a huge event. Not thinking, agreement. When the time came to pack, and travel, and take off from work – I was a little overwhelmed but also really excited to try new coffee shops. I mean, participate.

Without further ado (and in no particular order), some photos and related commentary.

Tacos 4 Life, Benton, Arkansas

I adore Tacos 4 Life. Bold, fun flavors, great ingredients, and a mission to donate a portion of every sale to others in need. A must try!

My hometown…tiny, no stop light, Avery, Texas

I took this photo intending to send it to a high school classmate, but then I forgot until I started writing here. Sorry, Jen. This convenience store has the best chimichangas in all the lands. Indeed.

Koffeewithakause (via IG), Bryant, AR

Incredible coffee from a local vendor. I drank me way through the states.

The Parthenon, Central Park area, Nashville, TN

Admittedly I’m not very interested in Roman, Greek, or any type of history, minus select, niche things. Trains. But an opportunity to view and explore the museum inside a gigantic Parthenon replica was a must do on my list. It did not disappoint.

Retirement cookies

And, finally, the retirement ceremony was everything mini’s dad had hoped it would be. It was a short yet emotional homage to his Naval career and I hope mini sees his time away as one which made her stronger and more resilient. The trip was a whirlwind but a necessary respite.

____________________

I ask you –

Of the four I mentioned, have you visited some/all/none?

What were your favorite things to do there?

Tell me how many retirement ceremonies you’ve attended. Countless.

(The post TX – AR – TN – KY first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

New Watch, Same Me

Garmin has a lot of faith in me! This is the Forerunner 955 Solar, a vast improvement to my previous Forerunner 265. The solar feature was a last minute decision, but since this is Texas and the sun is nearly always shining, I thought why not. Even without it, my battery, with regular use, lasts more than a week between charges. It says you can sit the watch in the sun and it will charge without overheating. Haven’t tried yet.

Thus far, I think the watch is much more accurate than my previous version, especially when it comes to heat acclimation. Very important to me. At the time of this post, I’m only 44% acclimated. When my other watch would give feedback, it commonly stated I was 78-80% acclimated when I hadn’t been running at all. Although it doesn’t influence my running habits, I would like a more realistic picture of heat acclimation, which I believe I’m receiving.

For me, this was a satisfactory, albeit expensive, purchase. My previous one, the Forerunner 200-something series, was great…no complaints, but when it started losing charge quickly and began having some glitches, I knew it was time.

Just like this post. It was time. Get it get it.

_________________

I ask you –

When did you last update your electronic gear?

Have you tried a newer version of a watch where it exceeded your expectations?

Tell me what you currently run with!

(The post New Watch, Same Me first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Confusion via Calendar

Based on some workplace conversations, I researched (broadly) the history of the Gregorian calendar vs Hebrew calendar. I found this article easy to read and understand: Noah’s Flood and God’s Calendar. As I choose not to debate politics or religion, looking beyond the scope of either, is an open minded understanding of something I cannot quantify…the oft ignored feeling. I have nearly always felt the month of January did not fit into my knowledge of a new year. Instead, it felt more like the culmination of one. Just as Saturday and Sunday are inexplicably considered the end of the week. It is my “feeling” perhaps we have allowed society and the lovely but sometimes inaccurate common knowledge to overrule our senses.

Did you know Sunday and Saturday bookend the work week, as displayed on any modern calendar? These are considered the rest days; therefore, we end with one and we begin with one. However, my mental picture is one of 5 days of work, then 2 days of rest, as if the week begins on Monday. The more I rearrange the mental image into bookends, the more care I take to preserve each of the bookends as separate days of a new week. Rest at the end, rest to begin.

Translating this into the annual calendar, the Gregorian calendar – the Western calendar, or solar calendar, adopted into use in 1582 – is the standard (January – December). Unless you operate in the government or in finances, then the calendar used is the fiscal calendar (1 Oct – 30 Sep). Starting to sound like meters vs feet. But, once upon a time, there existed the Hebrew calendar, or Jewish calendar, a lunar calendar, i.e., based on moon patterns. Lunar cycles have been (incorrectly) identified as reasons for erratic behavior, “lunacy”, and other stigmas. However, research thus far has not been able to corroborate these anecdotes. Sure, it is fun to blame it on the moon, but definitive correlations are still too far out (no pun intended).

I realize while writing this I am a walking contradiction. Some of it makes sense, some of it does not. Alas, the feeling remains. To believe the Hebrew calendar fits my narrative better than others (the beginning of the year starts in Spring) and to believe a bookended week feels better is decidedly unable to be validated. It is just a feeling.

__________________________

I ask you –

Have you studied historical calendars?

Do you consider yourself a contradiction?

Thoughts on a bookend weekend – yay or nay?

(The post Confusion via Calendar first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)