Not one to ever pass up an opportunity to be silly – a few examples below. I’m lucky my leadership plays along with my shenanigans.
Yes, awards are meant to be displayed but they’re not possible without the work, encouragement, and credit to those around me. 2023 was a wild year and I couldn’t have done it without the strong team around me. Really. This is all theirs.
Finally, it’s both a blessing and a curse that Parts works in marketing. Everyone and everything is fodder for jokes. We play too much. Amazingly, some questions did arise on how and where to vote for me. Although I’m humbled and genuinely surprised at the support, fortunately government jobs don’t work like this. And I had zero intention to run for this “office”, if you will.
It would be a shame if I was unable to run with all this pent up energy I’ve been experiencing. The actual volleyball intramural season is gaining traction, but I’ve made the right decision to coach/assist other coaches vs. play. Sure, the time commitment is still the same but I decrease the chance of injury by about 95%. My feet will thank me later.
_____________________
I ask you –
Are you a humorous person?
Have you ever coached a sport?
Share your best example of what not to do!
(The post Humorous Stuff first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)
Since I wasn’t running and school hadn’t officially started back up, we found other ways to occupy our time, like Phase 10! P.S. these card holder doo-dads are a lifesaver. And a sanity saver.
Huge appreciation to a fellow blogger and runner, Christina, @wanderingappleby, for the shoe recommendation. She mentioned that the Lone Peak 6 and Lone Peak 7 have their differences but since I couldn’t find the 6’s, I went with the 7’s. I’m excited to try out a new brand and have heard good things about them thus far. Obviously, after the foot debacle, which I absolutely never want to repeat, I’m trying some new things, considering (with PT advice) how to change my running split and a few other things to ensure I can keep running for years to come! I still love my Brooks – hello, brand loyalty – but the shoe shape just isn’t the best fit for me right now.
Blog post grand finale: you all know I’m typing this the day of, prior to the appointment, knowing my hopes and prayers have healed me. I can run! Indeed it has come to pass. No longer tied (strapped) into a boot is a little strange at the moment. Ankle mobility needs some work as does confidence in my foot strength. However, recovery doesn’t end when the circumstances change. As the MRI showed no issues and the x-rays indicated the same, it isn’t lost on me that I wore that boot for 6 weeks for what somewhat feels like no good reason; nonetheless, it can’t have hurt anything because I was pain free for those weeks.
Now to keep it that way. Until I’m ready to re-commit to surgery.
_____________________
I ask you –
Were you aware they make card holder doo-dads?
Any other shoes suggestions?
Tell me the last time you played a board or card game!
(The post I Can Run! first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)
As we (people) tend to either focus unhealthily on the negative portion of an event OR overinflate the positive parts, the middle stuff is often lost or overlooked in its importance. Therefore, I plan to chronicle my foot surgery and recovery so I may look back on it with a rationale perspective.
Long story time: at my pre-op appointment, a different issue was identified which prompted further X-rays and a MRI appointment (coincidentally scheduled for my original surgery date). Now, surgery may or may not happen toward the end of January. To say I was frustrated is to minimize my feelings. Cue the pity party and what ifs. I’m not happy wearing the walking boot; however, I almost hate admitting it – my foot doesn’t hurt in the boot.
The more I consider what everything looks like in these moments, the more I’m inclined to not go through with the surgery. As I’m still weighing the pros and cons, the decision is unclear but, right now, I don’t feel confident in doing it nor do I feel like this is the right path. Something just feels off. So I’ll continue to consider the options, wear the burdensome boot until the MRI results are shared, and pray about it.
This may not be my yes.
————————-
I ask you –
Have you ever had foot surgery?
Any advice for wearing this boot?
Tell me a time where you changed your mind about something serious.
(The post Footwork first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)
(This is the post I intended to publish on New Year’s Day, but we got home late and I overcommitted myself to doing all the things prior to sitting down to put the final touches on it. Hence, here we are today.)
Not being a fan of the traditional New Year’s “resolutions”, instead I like to focus on a “word of the year”. You know, something that resonates with me and that I can embody all year long. 2022 was grace, 2023 was strength, and 2024 is exhale. Simple enough, right? I write it in a few key places so I can be reminded regularly. What I do with the reminder, in the moment, is up to me but it’s nice to focus on one word. Below, the four words written above my word of the year are mantra-type words I want to remember. Although I have no idea how they factor into a year that has yet to be lived, I’m finding joy in believing they will be powerful.
2024 will bring about its own challenges, as each year does. Nearly a full year of writing my dissertation, mini will change school locations as she progresses, there’s that foot surgery business, dozens more blog posts, and anything else the world throws my way. Perhaps there will even be room for promotions. Nonetheless, focusing on my breathing and remembering to exhale through the little and big things is a nice part of living in this wild world.
Also, books. This was my first year as part of an actual (unofficial) book club! We read several books I would have never chosen myself but most were great! The Cuban Heiress by Chanel Cleeton. The Boys in the Boat by Daniel James Brown. For One More Day by Mitch Albom. And so many more…The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst was my favorite. Just what I needed at the time. Amidst the hustle and deadlines and stress of the holidays, it was a moment to settle my soul and feel what I needed to feel. And reprioritize. Definitely that.
Now, about the running portion of 2024. I keep a log of my annual miles – not too bad, if I do say so myself. Beyond the local (i.e., at work) 5k’s and one community run (Thanksgiving Day), I ran zero sanctioned races. And you know what? I feel no different than I did when I ran allll the races I could find. By my own calculations, I’ve been intentionally running for 7 years (2017-2023). Not too bad! Even though I’m unsure what 2024 will bring – foot issues, etc. – I know I will run again in 2024 and it won’t be pretty at first, but by the time I post the 2024 run mileage, I’ll still look back and think…wow. I did that.
Going through a rough patch of life and received the following advice: Don’t punish yourself for feeling too much. Why is this so hard?
Getting to see Christmas lights is an unconventional love language to me. Maybe it’s because it was the last experience my dad and I had before he passed. Beautiful downtown Dallas was lit up like a literal Christmas tree and as we drove through the lighted tunnels, even then, my young heart knew things were about to change. It’s an unexplainable feeling of sadness. But, today, I enjoy seeing Christmas lights, as well as long drives. Or walks. Those are lovely, too.
When I realized the impending foot surgery is quickly approaching, I decided to take every chance to run. So I ran 3 days straight. Then, I remembered that really wasn’t the best idea. Nonetheless, Garmin was pleased. I fantastically wanted to complete a 30-day run streak prior to surgery but when day 3 was incredibly rough I just didn’t have what it takes to power through, mainly because I couldn’t come up with a valid answer to that why question.
Every day, my watch is set to chime at 2pm. I call it my union break. Before, I considered it my take-a-moment break. Now I just consider walking to get coffee. More than consider. Often I find myself walking to get coffee. Around 2pm. But at least I’m moving my body!
_______________________
I ask you –
How much do you enjoy seeing Christmas lights?
Have you ever completed a run streak? For how long?
Something I have found incredibly irritating in the academia world is the complacency. Well, it’s in every world.
Story time.
As you may know, I’m seeking a dissertation chair so I may begin the dissertation process in 2024. The requirements are a chair and a reader (2 separate people). Thus far, I have a reader; however, in emailing and consulting with nearly a dozen professors now, I still have no chair. A chair is basically the dissertation god of one’s dissertation. The reader is like a fancy editor. Reader: check. Chair: negative. As you can imagine, I’m quite frustrated.
Back to complacency. In numerous conversations with potential chairs, I’ve received quite the feedback, but this one was the most eye rolling. The professor (mind you – he is considered an expert in his field, a phD holder, someone who professes to others on the subject of my doctoral degree) stated he had never heard of my potential subject subset. Further, he used the words “…in all my years…”. Enter complacency. My projected area of study has been around for decades; it’s not new. It’s also a simple combination of 2 well-known areas. The real issue is complacency with what “has always been done”. Granted, I’m harshly perceiving his words, but how often does it happen that someone becomes an expert and then stops actively learning? My guess is often.
To counteract my grumpiness and frustration, I got outside to enjoy some fall. Also, I was home with sick people so I needed an escape.
Don’t let me – get complacent, live for the “this is how we’ve always done it”, and forget to find fall.
Update prior to posting: I have a chair AND a reader!!!! Long story, I’ll explain later. So, now you all have to listen to me complain for the next <1.5 years about how I will manage to pull this off. But I will!
______________________
I ask you –
What are your thoughts on complacency?
Is it feeling like fall?
Tell me some of your good news! Happy Thanksgiving, tomorrow, to all who celebrate. I will, of course, be writing and catching glimpses of the football game.
(The post Don’t Let Me – first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)
Occasionally we have time to sneak away from work and do fun stuff, like go bowling! And eat copious amounts of holiday food, like banana pudding. It’s been a very busy past few months so team spirit and morale-inducing activities are exactly what was needed.
It’s a major award
Returning from the work trip and diving right into a short week of activities, volleyball, mini’s dermatology requirements (for another day), and realizing Thanksgiving is right around the corner – it’s a lot. Can’t forget to mention this course I’m in that has the capacity to literally kill me. How I wish I was a numbers person and understood coefficients and correlations and some dude’s name that stands for something in statistics. Ugh. I don’t know. This professor – whom I also had the previous semester – is destroying my papers. And I still don’t have a chair – have I mentioned this debacle yet? Wait for it.
Back to the team! I’m truly thankful for the people I work with, work for, and work alongside. It’s a longstanding joke about everyone stressing me out, but, truthfully, I’m the only one who stresses me out. At least I have a team of people who keep me going.
___________________
I ask you –
Are you a part of a work team or do you work solo?
When was the last time you went bowling?
Tell me about your Thanksgiving plans!
(The post Team Things! first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)
Kel, it can’t always be everyone else. Sometimes…it’s you.
Remember when (probably last week) I mentioned it had been the 2nd time someone scraped their tire against the front panel of my car? Well, upon the 3rd incident, I decided to reexamine the situation. It was me. Turns out – pun intended – when I pull into the garage, I’m cutting the angle a little too close and touching the garage panel. Whoopsies.
Incident #2
Typically I don’t share a lot on here that’s incredibly vulnerable and personal. Mostly I try to keep it positive yet self-deprecating because that’s funny to me; however, lately, for whatever reason, I was considering things I regret from a generalized perspective. And, I believe my biggest regret is how I was not there for my best friend when she needed me most. We’d been through so much together yet I bailed when all she wanted was acceptance. And I bailed at a critically horrible time in her life, when she was dealing with a medical crisis. As far as regrets, that’s definitely the biggest, almost unforgivable one I can think of. Others might disagree. If there’s ever a time when I can say it can’t always be everyone else, that time … It was all me. Occasionally we reach out to each other but it will never be the same. I hurt her. In a matter of minutes, I lost every ounce of trust she had ever placed in me. Rebuilding it might take forever. There’s no funny ending to this piece of information and it’s sad still.
But what isn’t sad yet is still applicable to everyone is the year I’ve had so far. I don’t love recognition from a large, well lit stage. Really, I want my team to be recognized for their contributions to my success because I wouldn’t be here without them. So, I would say to them, it isn’t everyone else, it’s you. And all of the you’s make it worth it.
_______________
I ask you –
Have you ever thought something was happening to you that wasn’t your fault?
Any advice for regaining trust in a long-term friendship?
As expected, my foots need expert, aka surgical, attention. You know – for all that technology has accomplished, how come there’s only a few options for feet? I did all the others. The surgeon was quite incredulous when I requested to have surgery on both feet simultaneously. But I persevered! Eventually, he came around to my way of thinking but it took some convincing. First, he says it’s dangerous when you can’t walk under your own power. Then, he says the pain may be too much. His final attempt at dissuading me was my mental health. Something about suffering from depression when unable to run.
I counteracted his every argument by saying I will sit at home and be a good patient; I have a high pain tolerance; and it makes more sense to have both feet done to allow me to complete my coursework at one time.
Then, when I visited my muse, her advice wasn’t quite what I wanted to hear but valuable nonetheless. She said, “Kel, you’re still Wonder Woman, but it’s an unearthly expectation to do all the things just because you can.” Granted, her words stopped me in my tracks and made me reconsider my decision. For a time. It’s difficult considering all the unknown variables, including being unable to play in the intramural volleyball league as originally planned. Now, I’ll just coach!
My wingwoman and I
So, all this to say my mind is pretty much made up. I may come to regret it but both feet is the way to go. Despite the circumstances and outliers, I know I can persevere. And I will.
Yet every time you make it through something that doesn’t kill you or land you in jail, there’s this overwhelming feeling of excitement and gratitude. I live for it.
___________________
I ask you –
Any big decisions on the horizon?
Could this be the dumbest decision I’ve made? It very well could be.
Finally completed the necessary x-rays to start the long process of making decisions re: me feets. One foot, two foots.
If only running was simply a hobby, or something I occasionally do for fun it would make this process seemingly easier. Instead, running is a way of life. It’s my way of clearing my head, making sense of life’s messiness, of putting the anxiety into focus, of leaving “me” behind for a few miles. I don’t run just to run; I run because I need it. The few months post-race circa December 2021 when I couldn’t run, when I thought I may never run again – difficult doesn’t begin to describe how I felt. Admittedly, there were moments of sheer panic and depression considering how I would navigate life without running shoes. It’s not the shoes that make the runner, it’s the getting out the door, breathing in one last time, then pushing forward. It’s the arm swing, the sound and feel of my feet hitting the pavement, the eventual exhaustion that signals a good run. It’s so much more than the word “run”.
Surrounded by kindness
In other news, I have a tough time making the decision to meter myself, in running, life, conversations, everything. Occasionally I remember to ask permission prior to forgiveness but it’s not often. Also, it’s comical when someone thanks me for my patience. Because I am not patient. Not even a little bit. I put on a show but inside I am an anxious mess of restlessness. Zero patience. I demand efficiency in all aspects. Patient? Not this girl. But thank you for believing I am.
Running on Fumes 
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