Re-Post: Call Sign STUMPER

(Second edition of re-posting while I’m away. This could be one of the funniest, shareable moments to happen to me thus far. However, if you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time, you will remember pt 2 of my call sign appearance. As always, keep reading.)

Allow me to share a story – it’s a long one. Have a seat.

In my (military, civilian, non-profit, etc) career(s), I haven’t had an opportunity to speak with anyone at the federal, national, even state level, to my knowledge. So when presented with such opportunity, I nicely jumped all over it. Some parts of this event were volun-told, but others were sheer chance alone. During a recent visit from the United States Air Force Chief of Staff (correction: now confirmed as the 22nd chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff), Gen CQ Brown, Jr., as hundreds of people crowded into an auditorium, I took my place about 5 rows from the front. Again, when would a visit from this official ever happen again? We were presented typical pre-speech information: don’t take selfies, turn your phone off, and (my favorite) here’s how to ask a question at the end. My friends and I made small talk, ahem, jokes. I regaled them with the story about the time I sang in front of the installation commander. Them: You can sing?! Me: Hahahaha no. On time as always the General arrived. He is a wonderful speaker, a seemingly humble individual, and a strong leader. His slides were short and his humor spot on. In many ways, he reminded me of my current squadron commander. I truly hope one day he, too, will grace stages with an entourage of security detail and big picture awareness. Approximately 30 mins later, the big QA session began. My hand went up before the words were out of the moderator’s mouth. I stood, politely introduced myself, and asked the following question: “Sir, as you have a high impact, high visibility position, what perception do you think we, as civilians and Airmen, get wrong about what you do?” Silence. Deafening silence. Suddenly I became the recipient of wild looks and laughter. The General began to pace the stage in silence. Finally, he answered. His answer was a well-rounded approach to being a father, husband, and son. He struggles with the same things we do. He worries about his children, now adults themselves. He sits around at night and can’t believe he gets to do what he does. I thanked him for his time so others could ask their questions. Fast forward to my office later – a conversation ensued between the Senior Leader and my supervisor. Cue the laughing. Unbeknownst to me, jokes of stumping the General were made on the surrey as he departed. I can only imagine my commander’s face. Kel, you need to stop speaking.

And that’s how I became known as STUMPER.

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I ask you –

Thoughts on the call sign?

Have you ever been laughed at?

Share your wild stories!

(The post Call Sign STUMPER first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Go and Grow

Sometimes good leadership lessons fall into my lap. Sometimes I seek them out. A recent devotional passage spoke to me in a way I knew I needed in that very moment:

Basically, one must sacrifice the perks of leadership for the price of leadership. And, you will never lead at a level higher than the level at which you lead and believe in yourself. Influence is based on the bar you set for yourself and how your “buy in” truly represents who you are as a leader. A leader must be willing to pay the price of being the example, the price of going first, if they desire others to follow their lead. (Leaders Go First, a YouVersion plan)

Growth never happens overnight but sometimes it comes in a good night’s sleep, sharing a glass of wine with a sweet friend, or simply making peace with your internal monsters. This is probably just based on perspective but I’m subscribed to my own perspective and how it impacts others in the way I lead. I’m incredibly proud of my title as director because I try to be as direct as possible, especially when others rely on me to make tough decisions. Sometimes I get it entirely wrong. And I admit it. But sometimes I get it so right that even I’m surprised. haHA

Photo by Mikhail Nilov on Pexels.com

Something else entirely surprising is when Parts talks about fixing things, like things with motors, and throws words around, like carburetors and spark plugs. I don’t know what household she grew up in but I just don’t have that type of knowledge. I can boost a car. That’s about it. I know what I like and what I’m good at. So if you ever hear me use the word carburetor in a sentence, I have absolutely no business getting dirty with whatever stupid idea is rolling around in my head.

Take the tools out of my hands. Save yourself.

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I ask you –

Are you drawn to leadership lessons?

How mechanically inclined are you?

Tell me your tool utilization ideas, please. Something an intellectual unicorn like myself can actually use for good.

(The post Go and Grow first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

How Convenient

Somehow I’m supposed to say no to preordering the latest rendition of my favorite shoe. We’re pleased to announce the Brooks Adrenaline GTS 23 will be available in August. Just in time for fall training. I’ve narrowed down my color options, now to make the final decision.

Pink

Black on Black

New shoes sound awesome but you know what isn’t awesome? This heat. I’m simply counting down the days to my beach side vacation where at least the smell of salt water mitigates the humidity. I managed 2 whole runs last week – but one was sooooo good I couldn’t move well for a few days afterward. As a quad-dominant runner, it’s both a blessing and a curse.

Our new director arrived a short time ago. He will be referred to in writings as the Cali Cowboy because I’m so good at nicknames. At first, it was Surfer Boy but it turns out he doesn’t surf. On the bright side, McK and I didn’t get fired for our naming conventions. Within 2 weeks of his arrival, we received notice of resignation of a co-worker so now the Cali Cowboy has to play that role, too. He did previously state how he learns best by being thrown into the fire.

Welcome to the sh*t show, sir.

__________________________

I ask you –

Shoes: pink or black?

How is the weather in your area?

I should probably disclose my blogging interests before he reads about himself on here.

(The post How Convenient appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Phone Photos

Found a bunch of random photos in my phone so here we go:

This is how I know mini was left unsupervised in my office. Who was supposed to be watching her?

When you’re doing 2 workouts a day, your entire laundry basket is shorts and sports bras.

When I spent my niece’s graduation gazing longingly at their gymnasium bleachers and wanting to know the brand so I can beg the government to fund them.

My work bestie and I running everything, including our mouths, attitudes, and being generally obnoxious.

__________________________

I ask you –

Have you ever had a taste of humble pie?

Do you like fried green tomatoes?

Rumor has it there will be a photo shoot with mini and cows!

Have you ever had to delete photos to make room for others?

Does your laundry change with the seasons?

If one more person asks if that’s my daughter…

More Prison Stuff

Radio question: could you escape prison? First thought – absolutely no. Next thought – why yes, I think I could. Nevermind the escape part, I think I could even thrive in prison. I’m a likeable woman. I can make friends easily. I’m understanding and hilarious! Not only would I do well in prison but I’d also be able to escape using the skills I presently have.

I could play a lot of games, like spoons!

Case in point: I can break things. Now, you may be wondering how this would help me but I think this skill is underutilized. Perhaps breaking things would present an opportunity to escape. It would require people much more skilled in fixing things to correct what I broke so maybe I befriend them to help me escape.

Example #2: I’m a wildcard, a swing state, if you will. When I enlisted at age 27, my strategy for navigating the drama and noise of boot camp was to lay low, speak to no one, and wake up very early for time alone. Armed with my contraband – tweezers and nail clippers – I kept myself sane. Toward the end, when my fellow Sailors needed more people on their sides for shift switches and all that, I had bargaining power because I’d been able to watch and evaluate personalities for an extended period of time. I remain close with only one of those ladies. The rest…wow. Anyway, I’m industrious and no one would expect it from me, making escape entirely plausible.

Granted, I hope I never make a prison appearance but I won’t rule it out. It could be fun. Friends, food, and unlimited workouts. Maybe I’m on to something.

__________________________

I ask you –

Have you ever had a taste of humble pie?

Do you like fried green tomatoes?

Rumor has it there will be a photo shoot with mini and cows!

Could you escape from prison?

Have you ever escaped from prison?!

Tell me something funny!

Go Fast Shoes!

Can we talk about how I’ve been missing out on speed shoes?! Long story short – I have weird, messed up feet from wearing the wrong size boots for 4 yrs. Turns out the Navy only measured one of my feet during gear issuance time (I have two feet) and issued boots that fit one foot properly. Now, I take a ton of responsibility in this mistake because I didn’t speak up. In my defense, bad things tended to happen to people who spoke up so there’s that. Eventually, it felt like the boots fit properly because after a certain amount of time your feet become deformed to fit the shape they are forced into. Long story not so short.

Which leads me to the present. Two different lengths and widths of feet complete with incredibly painful bunions (I think that’s what they are) which leave me self conscious and in pain almost constantly.

team weird feet

Moving on. I wear very supportive Brooks Adrenaline GTS shoes for nearly all my runs. However, I noticed a sale on the Brooks Hyperion Tempo, a version of their speed shoes. When people say “money ain’t a thang” they are lying. It’s definitely a thing! Sale…shoes…yes, please!

My feet felt like walking on clouds. Not super supportive, duh, they’re incredibly lightweight, but they made me feel like I could run faster than I’ve ever run before! By the time you’re reading this post, I’ll have completed another stride workout in these fancy shoes.

Obviously these are not my everyday shoes and certainly not made for long runs. However, when I want to feel fast – these do the trick.

__________________________

I ask you –

Have you ever had a taste of humble pie?

Do you like fried green tomatoes?

Rumor has it there will be a photo shoot with mini and cows!

Tried any new shoes lately?

If you also have them, what is your opinion of the Hyperions?

Share a speedy story!

Never Seen Before

It’s fascinating to me how often I hear the words, or some variation of, “We’ve never seen this before.” As it’s almost always said with shock, eliciting fear and a call to action, I’ve realized we don’t often say the complete opposite, “Oh I’ve seen this before.” Guaranteed many, many, many situations, events, or challenges have been seen before. Maybe it’s the generalization that bothers me most. I’m opposed to words like always or never because it’s rarely true. No one always does something, there will be times when they don’t. No one never says the right thing, surely this is a lie. The human behavior side of me rests on believing people do the right things. A cynic I am not.

As a generational statement, the phrase is incredibly subjective. Just because you haven’t seen it doesn’t mean someone else hasn’t. The start of WWI was thousands of people going “We’ve never seen this before”. Do you think by WWII people were suddenly saying “Oh, it’s fine, we’ve seen this before “. Eye roll.

On a slightly different note, family drama – at least in mine – is the result of unsupported mental health, trauma, and lack of adequate coping/communication skills. Basically everything. To protect the innocent and guilty, I won’t be slandering anyone on here – even if the truth does need to be told. Perhaps it’s not my story to tell, yet I will say one thing: when someone speaks up for themselves and emphatically stands behind their decision, I believe that’s the epitome of strength and healing. And it’s something we don’t often see or congratulate in the way it deserves. So despite the snarky last word and the passive aggressiveness of future interactions, I’m here for it. And I’ve seen all that before.

I know I’m super geeky about human behavior stuff, but this is interesting to me! The innate versus learned, nature vs. nature – whatever you want to call it. We’re all products of multiple pieces of our lives we have zero control over. It’s what we do with the pieces defined as choices that make us human.

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I ask you –

How often do you state “I’ve never seen this before!”?

Do you have family drama, too?

Tell me about a time when a choice impacted your life in an unexpected way!

(The post Never Seen Before first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

This is My Face

It’s official. No matter what I do, I give off mom vibes. To my coworkers, Spare Parts, and everyone else I’m around.

For example, Parts tells everyone I’m her mom and they believe her. She’s the oldest twin! Even prior to this – which is how the whole story got started – a coworker I knew had met Parts and asked if she knew me, then proceeded to ask Parts if I was her mother. FFS.

we’re not related at all

Example #2: my coworker/best friend/wingwoman McK and I went to a presentation. Someone whom I knew asked me if McK was my daughter. At first, I thought they had heard the stories of Parts. Oh no, they were serious.

CMSgt Bass and McK, my other daughter (apparently)

Example #3: the same wingwoman and I went to an appointment for her. Unfortunately, McK had a bout of laryngitis so I did the speaking for her since she could only whisper. As they took her to the back, the nurses asked did she want her mother to come? McK kindly declined but I HEARD IT ALL!

Soon I’ll be accepting suggestions for plastic surgery and a Botox provider. But maybe it’s not my face. Maybe it’s my attitude, the way I take charge and speak first. If that’s the case, then I’m doomed to forever be everyone’s mom.

Seriously, though, these expensive facial products are clearly not helping. Lies!

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I ask you –

Have you ever been mistaken for someone’s parent?

Do you think some people just give off a certain aura?

Now taking suggestions for plastic surgery. I need your input, please!

(The post This is My Face first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Thank You for Tuning In

A great guy doth not a leader make.
Me, after espresso

Therefore, on the day of our fearless unit leader returning to his rightful throne, aka big messy desk, I thought it fitting to mark his homecoming with a post. After all, he did hire me, unbeknownst to his well-being.

Fortunately for you all this post really isn’t about him. Exhale.

It’s about all the cool things I’ve done lately, you know, with all my spare time and non-demanding job requirements. Right. Those things.

a visit to 217 Coffee St

Returned to my first sport love: volleyball! I voluntold my coworkers that we were playing and they indulged me. This is fun! Note: a well developed running base sure does make volleyball a lot easier. What doesn’t make volleyball fun? A bandaged toe from racing a General (he didn’t know we were racing but of course we were) and the oft overlooked but no less important underboob. Well, the chafing of the underboob was the problem. Anyway, if you’re still reading after the mention of underboob – said three times now – then welcome to Running on Fumes, where we (and by we I mean I) type the ridiculous things that come to mind.

maximum, for sure

Fairly sure there was a point to this post.

Oh. Right. Cool things. I did stand out in the blazing heat giving out tickets to a drawing held by Spare Parts and the team of fabulous marketing folks who make all my wildest creative dreams come true. Mostly posters and schedules because I’m not creative at all. Also, I packed up an entire event’s worth of stuff in about 6 mins flat at the mention of severe thunderstorm, lightning, and hail. Did I already state it was hotter than jalapeno cornbread? They supplied me with multiple bottles of cold water, I worked for free. Until next year.

______________________

I ask you –

What’s your favorite sport? I particularly like curling.

Is it still cool where you live or getting hot?

Tell me your thoughts on cornbread! Yuck. Not a fan.

(The post Thank You for Tuning In first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

But Can We?

At times, I think I’m too focused on the behavioral aspect of, well, everything. Human behavior is one of the most fascinating parts of life. I want to know why people are the way they are, why they do what they do, and what the thought process was to get them there. Pretty sure I’m the most trustworthy person in the entire world. I mean, the Navy trusts me and I keep all their secrets, so … No fear I’ll tell anyone else’s. Promise.

As usual, I digress. Focus! Maybe this is why – I’m always evaluating my papers from the behavioral perspective. Not that I’m not focused on solutions but I sincerely want to understand the underlying causes and thought process. And maybe the foolishness leading people to bad ideas. Been there.

But I think it’s also a limitation. My muse stated, “sometimes we can’t make sense of things.” My heart believes that…yet my brain is on a rollercoaster of Oh Yes We Can! I want to know all the things. I want to make sense of it. During a recent “What Color Is Your Brain?” training, it turns out I’m a red. Obviously.

So the real question here is how best to utilize my red brain, especially around the super sentimental blue-brained people and the OCD yellow people and the very creative orange-brainers. And, on that note, even as I write this with a clingy 7 yr old attached to my side, I know in my heart – I still need to go write another paper. Why am I like this?

I ask you –

Does human behavior fascinate you?

Have you ever taken this particular training? If so, what color were you?

Tell me what you have going on this week! Wk 7 of 8. So close.

(The post But Can We? appeared here at Running on Fumes.)