Authorship

I’m officially published!

You can read the full dissertation here: Immigration Federalism in the United States: Texas Case Studies. The next step is distributing the publication to the cities who participated in order to a) make good on my promise to share and b) hopefully produce valued change. Although only one of those is within my power, I’ll soon be applying for adjunct professor positions in hopes to share my knowledge of the policies and systems in place within local Texas communities. To say I’m humbled is still an understatement. Some days I am in disbelief my PhD journey has ended. While I continue to cheer on my friends who are deep in the throes of their own doctoral journey, I want to forever remain a valuable contributor to higher education.

The bound work arrived in the mail – all 6+ lbs of it. 6 POUNDS! It looks like it belongs in the Library of Congress, so said my spouse. If all else fails, I’ve created a massive paperweight.

This is also mini’s first year taking the standardized tests of all public schools. Right, wrong, or indifferent, I believe testing has a purpose yet after the anxiety-ridden day I experienced for her first of two tests, I’m beginning to believe and finally fully understand testing is even more difficult for the parents! At the time of this posting, she will have finished both tests and is officially free and clear to enjoy the final weeks of her school year. Then, we can do it again next year! When mini asked how many tests she’ll take in her life, I stated she would be continually tested…and tested. Tis the circle of life.

———————–

I ask you –

Do you experience test anxiety or discomfort?

What advice would you give a young student?

Tell me your most difficult test.

(The post Authorship first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Wherever There Is

An ode to personal growth, making tough choices, and speaking my truth. Wherever there is – as we have no idea where life will take us, why, or who it’s surrounded by.

3rd grade!

Belief first, correction later. I saw this on a post and it hit me like a ton of bricks. How often do I correct mini before I believe what she is saying? Guilty. We probably all do this – we fact check others before acknowledging they have a right to their opinion and, more importantly, a right to their feelings. The post went on to say our children need us to sit in the discomfort with them, to know we care about their feelings, PRIOR to reasoning with them. How many people know anxiety is not reasonable? Hands high. I don’t need someone to say my thoughts are not realistic, I’m well aware they’re not!, what I need is reassurance I will be ok.

Along the lines of being ok – middle of last week, I very nearly lost my life. Ok ok, so I’m dramatic. As I’ve stated before, the final year of my dissertation is comprised of 15 week semesters. Last week was Wk 14. Until it wasn’t. I received an email stating Friday, 16 August was the due date for both Wk 14 and 15. WHICH MEANT…I was required to submit my manuscript more than a week before I intended.

One week. Just one week. Sounds minimal, right? If you don’t keep meticulous planning calendars and structure your entire existence around writing a 600+ page manuscript, then sure, it’s probably minimal. Not for me! So, I cried. I got frustrated. A little angry, too, perhaps. Then I cancelled all my plans and got busy. Suffice to say, in 3 days, I completed a manuscript worthy of expedited submission and now we wait. 14 weeks, 296 pages, 69.3K words. Easy, right?!

The good news is I get an unexpected break. And I purchased a pair of shoes as a reward. Short of the submission being classified as an official failure, I’m in good shape for the shape I’m in.

Correction: Hahaha I jest. I made another miscalculation and I don’t have a week break. It appears Wk 14 and 15 are jammed together (aka were due Friday) because the next course starts the following Monday. i.e., today. Wonderful. Lovely.

“There” is wherever life takes you and I’m just along for the ride, it seems.

Wk 14/15: added 16 pages

P.S. this is the final iteration of the chart. It served its purpose and now I feel like it’s more of a chore/unneeded pressure to include it. Thanks for playing along. Surely I can find something else to entertain you. Maybe I should be monitoring my stress levels more?

________________

I ask you –

Are you a corrector or a listener?

How surprised would you have been?

Tell me about your most recent unexpected event!

(The post Wherever There Is first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Don’t Let Me –

Something I have found incredibly irritating in the academia world is the complacency. Well, it’s in every world.

Story time.

As you may know, I’m seeking a dissertation chair so I may begin the dissertation process in 2024. The requirements are a chair and a reader (2 separate people). Thus far, I have a reader; however, in emailing and consulting with nearly a dozen professors now, I still have no chair. A chair is basically the dissertation god of one’s dissertation. The reader is like a fancy editor. Reader: check. Chair: negative. As you can imagine, I’m quite frustrated.

Back to complacency. In numerous conversations with potential chairs, I’ve received quite the feedback, but this one was the most eye rolling. The professor (mind you – he is considered an expert in his field, a phD holder, someone who professes to others on the subject of my doctoral degree) stated he had never heard of my potential subject subset. Further, he used the words “…in all my years…”. Enter complacency. My projected area of study has been around for decades; it’s not new. It’s also a simple combination of 2 well-known areas. The real issue is complacency with what “has always been done”. Granted, I’m harshly perceiving his words, but how often does it happen that someone becomes an expert and then stops actively learning? My guess is often.

To counteract my grumpiness and frustration, I got outside to enjoy some fall. Also, I was home with sick people so I needed an escape.

Don’t let me – get complacent, live for the “this is how we’ve always done it”, and forget to find fall.

Update prior to posting: I have a chair AND a reader!!!! Long story, I’ll explain later. So, now you all have to listen to me complain for the next <1.5 years about how I will manage to pull this off. But I will!

______________________

I ask you –

What are your thoughts on complacency?

Is it feeling like fall?

Tell me some of your good news! Happy Thanksgiving, tomorrow, to all who celebrate. I will, of course, be writing and catching glimpses of the football game.

(The post Don’t Let Me – first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

Doctoral Dumpster Diving, pt 2

I know I said this would be a series, but I didn’t expect it to be so soon. Probably should have known that.

When some research literally brainwashes you into such a position that you have no idea what’s reality and what’s utter BS – does that mean you’ve finally made it?! I’m so far into the weeds, I honestly can’t tell. All I know is I started writing and didn’t put the proverbial pen down until it was complete. Which is a far cry better than writer’s block, in my opinion. Especially when I’m getting paid to write. Details.

Completely confident my entire dissertation is/will be a load of garbage. Which is funny because I was so excited about it initially. I wanted to change the course of research! I wanted to contribute to the knowledge base. Now? Please let me survive this with a small semblance of sanity.

The hardship and coinciding blessing of a doctoral program is loneliness. There’s little if any interaction with other students so you lose that human touch, the connectedness. As most are online programs, it’s not like I can reach out to a fellow student for advice. Even worse is when a professor either gives no feedback or such subjective feedback that it feels like they missed the point entirely. It’s not that I need acknowledgement because I recognize this is a choice I made, but it wouldn’t kill them to acknowledge it either.

Like I said, I’m so far into the weeds of analysis lately I don’t even know where reality is anymore. In the meantime, I’ll just keep pulling crap out of the bottom of the dumpster and selling it as my own!

__________________________

I ask you –

Do you have any mottos?

Where does sanity even come from?

Tell me about a time when you expected acknowledgement and it never came.

(The post Doctoral Dumpster Diving, pt 2 first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)