Tag: care

A girl and her purchases

It’s been “years” since we had a girl’s day, according to mini. So, during a midweek holiday, we drank coffee, shopped, and genuinely enjoyed not being rushed or fighting huge crowds of people with the same intentions.

On the drive home, the song Lowrider came on the radio. Mini’s body instinctively started moving. She just can’t help herself. Raised on good music from only the best decades (ahem), and with her dancer’s heart, her arms were moving, her head was going another direction, and her body was wiggling. She proudly exclaimed, “I don’t know what this is but it’s a jam!”

For posterity, of course
I support local
Noodle monster
She supports anything with boba

Earlier in the day, she couldn’t know I was lost in thought regarding a commercial – something about Kelsey Grammer saying veterans return from missions often hampered by internal and external turmoil, dealing with what they’ve seen or experienced but unable to openly share the struggles. It reminded me of a post I had seen that morning regarding how the stigma of PTSD was reduced by removing the D, the word disorder from it. PTS is somehow not as triggering as PTSD although the concept, symptoms, treatment, and worldview mostly remain the same. Are you following? The post went on to say just because you reduced the acronym doesn’t mean a veteran should reduce their need to firmly continue using the full PTSD terminology when seeking VA benefits or any kind of medical care.

Stay with me here. Mini couldn’t have known I was down this rabbit hole. We’re driving. Amicable silence. Me lost in thought. Apparently she was, too. Because she blurts out, “Mom, do grasshoppers bite?!” Her innocence knocked me out of my loophole. No, I don’t know if they bite. But I do know that perhaps the girl’s day was more about self-care and reconnection than it was about the shopping or the coffee.

courtesy of Mission 22 via instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/DZsOAT1Ds9p/?igsh=NTNpYW9vbnRvMTZv

The screenshot above is courtesy of Mission 22 via Instagram. There are several slides detailing the changes so please use the link I furnished to read further.

Moral of the story –

You can change the acronym but you can’t change the very real effects. You can remove a word but you can’t remove being seen. You can request the VA update their terminology but you should never expect a veteran to overlook what is happening to them and the care they deserve to receive.

____________________________

I ask you –

Ask mini how she pronounces purchases. Trust me. You’ll need this laugh!

(The post A girl and her purchases first appeared here at Running on Fumes.)

© 2026 Running on Fumes

As It Goes

“We’re not depressed, we’re discouraged.”

How often do we – the collective – find ourselves down, tired to the point of exhaustion, sad, or unmotivated? Pot, Kettle.

Credit: word porn via Instagram

I manage to find small ways to “fill my bucket”, so to speak. Seasons in life require us to take from one bucket to pour into another just to stay afloat. Anyone want to juggle?! At the end of the day, after filling countless buckets that may not even be mine, recharging my batteries – aka filling my bucket – is top priority. This isn’t relegated to end of day either!

Taking Care of You!

What do you enjoy doing? How do you fill your bucket? It’s easy to find myself saying I’ll go see them (insert whomever) soon or I’ll call them tomorrow or, my personal favorite, I’ll add it to my list! Which list, Kel? Then I never get around to it and my bucket is filled with other things and what-do-you-know it never happens. Supplies!!

Bucket filling can be as simple as taking a walk around a bookstore and indulging in expensive coffee. For me, I visit my children’s shelter coworkers. Those women know how to make me laugh. And they remind me where I came from…a 19 yr old girl missing pieces of her heart. She was a mess. They know more about what I believe in than any words could convey. We laugh, cry, and share what it means to be a true friend. They fill a bucket within me.

Taking Care of Others!

Perhaps you fill a bucket for someone else; you probably don’t even realize what you’re doing. It can be a kind word, a text, a joke, even a smile. You know the feeling you get when someone says they saw something the other day that reminded them of you? Unless it involves cops. It only takes a second for you to give the gift of water into an empty pail.

Speak good things into another’s life! How convenient we find it to blame, ridicule, or negate someone else’s happiness when it really shows how empty our bucket truly is. The “you never”s are a reflection of our own insecurities. You know that saying about ‘Be the change you want to see in the world’? Start being it.

As far as discouragement goes, I firmly acknowledge depression is real. It manifests physically, mentally, and spiritually. However, I believe, more often than not, we are more discouraged than depressed. Life lets us down. We get in our own way. Discouragement + empty buckets = sadness, loss of hope, etc.

Taking It All In!

Recognize your buckets! Share your struggles! Feel free to juggle, but don’t live on the Merry Go Round of Paul & Peter. You know, robbing Peter to pay Paul or however it goes. Stop occasionally. Ask for help!

If all else fails, do you know how much wine a bucket can hold?! Probably a lot…I’m willing to find out!

__________________________

I ask you –

Was this helpful at all? Do you understand the concept of buckets?

How often do you unexpectedly reach out to someone to say you’re thinking about them? You don’t remember? Then do it right now!

Please share what works for you when it’s time to refill your bucket!