Little Big Things

Really everyone? No one called me out on my misspelling of “thou” on last week’s post? Come on!

Sometimes I panic on a Thursday afternoon when I realize I’ve not written a single post for the following week. Other times I have many options awaiting a small edit before I can publish. Rarely do I make any snap decisions to re-work what’s already scheduled. Just the times when you win free shoes for 20 years or when the love of your life returns. You know, just the little things.

I believe there are moments in life when it’s easier to live ignorantly. Think about it. When developing a new friendship, do you blurt your entire life story immediately or does it slowly reveal itself in time? To complicate things, maybe there’s a huge secret you don’t wish them to know for fear of judgment or worry it will end the relationship before it can even begin. It’s not too wild to consider. So if it started off this way, who’s to say it can’t restart the same? Always with the rhetorical questions.

This post won’t seem overt to many, but it’s momentous in my own life. I’m patiently reminded there’s only one captain of my ship; no other power can make decisions for me. What has been built up will not easily be torn down. My feelings lie squarely within this blog, but they can have infinite meaning. Remember being bonded to another soul gives no right to their suffering. Putting in work to rebuild what is broken, lost, or overlooked is not an easy task.

As a recovering rescuer, I find it too easy to fall back into the same trap. Not this time. Our words are somewhat guarded yet expectation is a tone all its own. I have questions…where have you been, what has changed, and why now? Were you waiting on me to make the first move? Are you going to quit trying again, without warning? I may be stronger, but I am not invincible.

Sleepless nights reveal much; but one thing remains the same: no matter the hour, my heart belongs to you. I don’t need labels. I just need to know you’re going to be there.

_______________________

I ask you –

Is preparedness a key to happiness?

Do you answer your own questions?

Tell me something good!